I Like My Crow with a side of Humble Pie

I did something I thought I would never do. I got married, again. I am a self proclaimed expert on how not to be married. I told the world that I would not do it again, ever….never….nope never. Did I say I was never getting married?Yes, yes I did.

My husband and I met when we were twelve years old, on a school bus headed to middle school. On that school bus he sat on the middle of the bus, in my favorite seat, you know the one with the hump on the floor. One day as I got on at my stop he patted the seat he was in and said: “Sit.” For some unknown reason, I sat. We began to talk about everything and nothing. Before we knew it we were at school. That afternoon on the hour-long ride home we continued to talk. At my stop, he got off the bus and we sat on my front porch steps until dark talking. To this day, I have no idea how we had so much to talk about or where we found all the things we said.

I was the new girl and he was the local boy. He was a nerd. Not a Sheldon nerd, but at least a Leonard nerd. He loved Star Wars and playing D & D. I was into riding my bike and swimming at the beach. We lived on an island in Florida where there wasn’t much else to do. He spun stories as he created game characters and read comic books. I wrote poetry and stories in my journal while listening to 80s pop music. We were two sides of the same coin.

Then life happened. The two kids grew up and married other people, had careers and children. We remained friends. There were missed opportunities and missed chances. Love was there. It was a quiet whisper when we needed it to scream, but love doesn’t work that way.

Fast forward. More kids and divorces later…

God has a way of putting in front of you want you to need. It is up to you to see it and take hold. He also has a way of knocking you to your knees if need be, so pay attention. How does that old saying go, life happens when we are making plans. We plan, God laughs. Yeah, so let’s just say life happened.

One day, one beautiful and amazing day, love spoke up. God moved us to stand in front of each other. I looked at him and my heart said, “There he is.”

We reconnected. We were content to live unmarried. We had made vows and promise to each other and that was all we needed. We had lived without each other for too long. We know what that was like and do not ever want to go back there. We know what loneliness is and we know that we are much better together than apart. We do not need a piece of legal paper or an event to prove that we made those promises. We do not need to prove to anyone that we are a matched set.

Then, something changed. We did not need to get married. We wanted to get married, so we did.

Moral of the story. Listen to love. Pay attention to God when he is speaking to you, the first time.

And, do not ever say never. Crow is tough and humble pie is not sweet.

Believe in second, third and fourth chances.

~Lori O’Gara

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